El Davo in El Spaino

Photo Compendium, November until now!

2009-11-15T16:21:00.005+01:00

Fútbol Ocho and Washed Stones again

2009-11-08T19:45:00.011+01:00

Overtaken by laziness, El Davo is posting the reports of matches on 1 Nov and 8 Nov in a super compendium addition.

On the first of November, Chapi had the embarrassment of only having 10 men available owing to a string of feeble excuses from those not willing to face the heat of a fiercely warm November morning. Our even more embarrassed opponents (who's name I didn't catch), turned up with only 6 men.

Picture: Charles 1, Peter, George 1 and keeper Joseph.

With typical Spanish creativity, an 8-a-side match was organised with Marcelo and Luciano (El Negro) donning the bright yellow shirts of our guests. Suffice to say, fun was had and Chapi ran out 10-5 winners with the temperature in the low 20s.

Picture: Arthur, Peter (examining substantial belly) and Lewis.

The following week, Chapi entertained the team from Ávila whose name translates as 'stone washed' or something like that. We seem to play these sturdy chaps every other week!

The weather had turned from a balmy 23C the week before to a chilly and windy 9C or so, but off we went without baby-face Robert and as usual went behind to an early goal.

Picture: Lucas striding forward looking for George.

Strikes from George 1 and I think Marcelo who got his shiny bonce in the way of an 35-yard Edward free kick to guide the ball under the bar, put us 2-1 up at half-time.

A long through ball caused havoc in the Chapi defence and keeper Joseph was lobbed (not difficult) by the opposing centre-forward to bring it back to 2-2.

However, two late goals by Rafael and someone else (probably Arthur) ensured Chapi ran out 4-2 winners in a match finished under the powerful Chapi Stadium floodlights.

Picture above left: Large Chapi crowd braving the elements

Picture above right: Marcelo, Joseph 1 and Edward

El Davo is back

2009-10-04T16:31:00.018+02:00

Well, after a July and August getting soaked in the English rain as opposed to being baked by the Spanish sun, El Davo returned on the last day of August.

Picture: Yawning Pedro, with Carlos and Marcelo

After eternal whining from my Chapi colleagues, this report will be continued in typical El Davo Spanish.

Anyway, a quick English summary first. Yesterday (3 October) despite being 2-0 down and 3-3 at earlier points of the game, Chapi triumphed 9-3 against neighbours San Martin de Valdeiglesias. Last week the unthinkable happened when Chapi lost! This has been put down by all as an inability to play on real grass.

Foto: Luciano y Luis

Bienvenidos al blog de eldavoinelspaino. Después un montón de quejas del equipo de fútbol de Chapanería (come on cabrón), intento escribir esta vez en el español. La semana pasada perdimos a Navas de Marques, un pueblo que consiste de unas vacas y no mucho mas pero un equipo de fútbol bueno. Jugamos muy mal porque jugamos en un campo de césped. No acostumbrados jugar en este superficie. Preferimos la moqueta del estadio Chapi o tierra con muchas piedras.

Foto: José intendiendo volar sin avion

El partido esta semana fue contra San Martin de Valdeiglesias y con 15 minutos de acción, estábamos perdiendo a 2-0. No se como pero por el descanso, estábamos ganando 3-2. El resto del partido fue el show de baby-face Robert (cara de bebé Roberto) quien metió mas o menos el resto de los goles. Al final, ganamos 9-3. Carlos y Jorge metieron golazos y El Davo solo dio una patada a uno del equipo contrario (pero bastante fuerte).

Foto derecha: Golazo de Jorge

Foto abajo: El Talisman Arturo con El Davo

Después disfrutamos comida y bebidas en el bar donde varios borrachos intentaron hablar en inglés pero con poco éxito.

No game next week due to some saint or other, so reports will resume the week after next. Best wishes from sunny and warm Spain in October.

two more Chapi wins as Spain heats up!

2009-06-11T22:18:00.009+02:00

Due to inexcusable laziness, the updates to the blog are becoming more infrequent. So, here is a compendium edition.Three weeks or so ago, Chapi met the village from Ávila for what seems to be the 20th time this season in what became an ill-tempered affair with accusations of ref bias and general hanky-panky. Breaking convention, Chapi contrived to score first and I wish I could remember who got the goal. It was probably baby-face.

Picture: smug looking El Davo pre-match

Anyway, at the final whistle, the eleven battling Chapierians had chalked up another win (4-2) to add to the long unbeaten record stretching back to the autumn.

An informal post-match interview with baby-face Robert revealed that he is in fact 38 and played professionaly at a time presummably, when he looked about 18 months old.

Picture: Arthur, surrounded by defenders, trying to spot the ball

The following Thursday, a match was arranged during the holiday of Corpus Cristi at nearby Navas del Rey, on their dusty, rock hard, pitch in the middle of a grim industrial estate. A Chapi invitation team including several nationalities took on the locals.

Picture: Chapi International

Decked out in a 'Liverpool like' strip, in temperatures in the low thirties, Chapi survived the baking sun and aggressive opposition to record another victory thanks to the usual suspects, Arthur and baby-face Robert.

Chapi sweat in comeback thriller

2009-05-23T22:27:00.014+02:00

Another tense encounter faced Chapi vets one sunny May Saturday afternoon after a thundery Friday night. On this occasion, El Davo was accompanied by Little El Davito Christopher, AKA 'fatboy', who volunteered to be both still and video camera operator.

Picture: El Davo in characteristically delicate challenge

Another match against the team from the mountains roughly translated as 'clean stones' ensued. As usual Chapi started slowly, presumably to raise tension in the sparse crowd. The introduction of El Davo after 25 minutes prompted the visitors to go ahead with a screamer, amazingly captured on video by star cameraman Christopher.
Picture: goal number three from Marcelo.

It wasn't long before Rafael put Chapi ahead (also on video) and the interval was reached with a fairly comfortable lead of 2-1. A steady start to the second half was blighted by a defensive mishap which allowed the visitors to draw level.

In a final flourish, new boy Marcelo, rolled in the third and Lucas with a speculative cross and Arthur with an outrageous flick from a corner, added two more. A highly disputed late penalty for the guests made the final score 5-3 to Chapi and another step towards immortality in the annals of Sierra de Madrid football.

Pictures below: Arthur hovering with the goal at his mercy and probably (but not quite sure), Lucas's precision cross on it's way over the keeper's head into the top corner..

Pictures below: Arthur's outrageous flicked goal from a corner and pre-match interview between El Davo and fat boy.

Miracle on Chapi Street

2009-05-18T11:17:00.005+02:00

Omens are omens and they were not good as Chapi vets prepared for their next foray.

Picture: Luciano (watched by Lewis 2) , pirouetting elegantly - as his name would suggest - pre-match.

First: Only a bare eleven turned up including old lags the two Lewis's and El Davo.
Second: No goal keeper present and after El Davo vociferously declined, Charles 3 took the gloves.
Thirdly: Our opponents, Boadilla del Monte looked young, fit and good, with two or three subs.

The omens continued and after 20 minutes, Chapi were 2-0 down. No hope left, the unbeaten run over, let's try to avoid humiliation, no other option.

Picture: Before the match. Rafael, looking more and more like his Italian artist namesake, with a pensive baby-face.

Well, with the pressure off, Chapi started to play. Baby-face Robert pushed on to his left foot 20 yards from goal, unleashed a rocket that cannoned off the bar and was bundled in by Lucas. Not long after, Boadilla tried repeatedly (and ill-advisedly) to dribble from their own 6-yard area and in the resulting melee, the ball richoched slowly over the line.

More fun to come. Shortly before the break, baby-face found himself free again and in a one-to-one with the keeper, slotted home.

Picture: A disbelieving and knackered George 1 at half-time.

A bemused Chapi, spent half-time wondering how on earth they were winning. But what the hell! The second half proceeded with Chapi holding out despite (or due to) El Davo's tough tackling, and sometimes fouling, around the Chapi box. The final whistle went and Chapi ran out 3-2 winners.

After a break, it's probably time for more profiles. This week Lucas. A cultured defender or mid-fielder, Lucas did complain some months ago for having his 'air hot' pictorally highlighted on the El Davo blog. A quick interview determined that he works in the building trade and is finding it tough with the crisis. Father to a baby (of indeterminate sex) born in March, Lucas was one of the Chapi stars in the wars (along with George above of course - look hard for the joke!), in the Boadilla match going off with a knee injuring but bravely returning to see in the victory.

A weekend off due to some saint or other will hopefullly be followed by another outing shortly.

El Davo is back!

2009-04-26T22:04:00.018+02:00

Well, first of all, here is the ElDavomachine. Purchased from nephew James, this Kawasaki ZZR600 is lighting fast just like El Davo............ or at least how he used to be last century. Reaching nearly 100mph in second gear, it has been useful in scaring the life out of El Davito 2 (aka Fatboy) and El Davito.

Talking of El Davito, he is recovering from ramming a white van with his souped-up scooter and spreading himself and various bits of the bike over the road. The offending motorist, who pulled out without looking, took one look at the prostrate El Davo, mumbled something and went back into his house. A trip to hospital in an ambulance resulted in the diagnosis of various abrasions, and strains to his leg, shoulder and neck. While bringing his lifeguard training to a temporary halt, he has recovered well enough to continue his breast-stroking (allegedly) and irritating all a sundry.

The all-star Chapinería team that recently took on unfancied Villanueva de Perales in a tournament consisting of only two teams. The match was played on a pitch that was half way between a concrete car park and Weston-super-Mare beach with a healthy sprinkling of weeds and razor-sharp stones. El Davo, enthusiastic as usual, managed to take the skin of both knees within 10 minutes of the start to the dismay of both teams and the hoards of spectators.

Suffice to say, Chapi won again (4-2), to take their unbeaten record past the six-month mark, with strikes from baby-face Robert and I can't remember who else. A cup was presented with little fanfare and the legendary band trouped off for adventures new. Watch this space.

Picture: Josephs 2 and 1, El Negro and baby-face prior to kick-off.

Picture: Rafael taking on opposing defender

Young El Davo triumphs

2009-03-05T00:23:00.006+01:00

Before the days of colour photography and when men's hairstyles were still fashionable, El Davo (3rd from left) is here depicted sometime in the early seventies - exact date under investigation - with his team-mates at the Bristol Downs League side Durdham Down Adult School, having just won the Norman Hardy Cup. This competition involved (and still involves) teams in the top two divisions of a league which boasts sixty odd teams all playing on the same patch of grass on Bristol Downs.

An interesting point of interest is that the bushy-haired young man (far left) named Adrian O'Connor, is the step-father of one of El Davo's colleagues at a language school in Madrid - small world eh?

El Davo between the sticks in the sticks

2009-03-01T20:22:00.008+01:00

The eternal optimist, El Davo arrived for the game against Griñon (Green-yon) at Chapi Stadium carrying the previous week's injury but not unduly concerned. However, things became more tense in the changing rooms when it transpired that we only had 11 fit players (or supposedly fit players) and no goalkeepers. Occasional player, Charles 3 donned the keeper's kit but it became evident quite quickly that although able to run after a fashion, El Davo could not kick the ball with his right foot. While not a particular handicap for Maradona in his prime, this was a severe restriction for somewhat less talented El Davo.

Picture: El Davo or is it Peter Shilton?

So, shirts were swopped and El Davo took up an unfamiliar position in goal. The first time in nearly forty years of amateur football. Well, things did not start well as after 10 minutes or so an opposing forward was put clean through and slipped the ball passed a groping ED.

Fortunately, Chapi were coming more and more into the game and strikes by Arthur and baby-face Robert put our heroes 2-1 up at the break with no further particular alarms at the back. However, El Davo's teamates were somewhat astonished by their new goalkeeper's proclivity to attack incoming crosses by punching the ball upfield whilst soaring spectacularly through the air. I think they thought it was some kind of English thing.

Picture: Half-time discussions. Those English are nuts!

Shortly after the start of the second half El Davo thew himself to his left to parry a Griñon thunderbolt only to be beaten sortly afterwards by a screamer from the edge of the box into the bottom left corner. However, baby-face was a determined man (or boy) today and scored two beauties to seemingly put the game beyond the visitors.

But Griñon are made of stern stuff and El Davo could only stand and watch as a shot from the edge of the box thundered through a sea of players into his top right corner. This followed almost immediately by the Chapi defence going awol and Griñon slamming in another.

Despite having to kick left-footed from the hand, El Davo continued to look surprisingly accomplished and a late strike from baby-face sealed the 5-4 win and a fun day out for all. Particular mention should also be made of a captain's performance from Charles 1 and sterling work from George 1 until forced off with a thigh strain.

With a crunch match against El Davo's home village of Robledo next week, the offending right knee was quickly packed in a packet of frozen prawns with the hope of a quick recovery.

Hard duel at El Escorial

2009-02-22T21:43:00.012+01:00

Chapi encountered a tough El Escorial side on a warm February afternoon in the Madrid Sierra. Going 1-0 down 20 minutes into the first half, a spectacular solo goal from baby-face Robert evened things up and was quickly followed by an Arthur strike to take Chapi into the break 2-1 up.

Photo: Kick-off at picturesque El Escorial Stadium.

El Davo, having picked up a twisted knee, continued on and vented his discomfort in a number of crunching tackles on opposing forwards. A tough and combative second half saw El Escorial level only for Arthur to strike again. Two further goals from the hosts resulting from defensive mixups looked like ending Chapi's long unbeaten run. However, a re-energised Arthur equalised with minutes to go and still had time to miss a sitter in the dying moments. So, a 4-4 draw and probably a fair result.

Photo: a relaxed El Davo, enjoying the sun.

Further pictures. Nervous Chapi bench close to the end and nervous Joseph 2 (that goal looks too big)

This is not England

2009-02-19T22:11:00.005+01:00

Sometimes our children impress us, sometimes disgust us, sometimes surprise us. Things are no different with El Davo.

Youngest son of El Davo, Christopher (aka fatboy) is becoming a living legend in provincial Spain. His behaviour should not be condoned in any way and his exploits should be used as a warning to others (really!).

Earlier escapades included the construction of bombs from various chemicals and a Coke bottle which apparently can be viewed on youtube - this is along with a video of a battle between the family cat, who was later forceably evicted, and an invading squirrel (the squirrel lost).

More recent adventures have involved blowing up neighbours' post boxes using homemade explosives. These have attracted the attention of not only the neighbours involved but the local constabulary.

As for El Davito (small El Davo), his recent claim to fame is running over a rogue partridge, stuffing it in a plastic bag (while still half-alive), taking it home, killing it, cooking it and eating it for dinner.

This all makes El Davo's regular runouts with Chapinería Vets significantly less impressive.

Burgohondo Reprise

2009-02-15T00:07:00.020+01:00

This sunny February afternoon started in perplexing fashion for El Davo when told that our opponents were Burgohondo. Were'nt last week's opponents Burgohonda or Burgohondo? Anyway, they had Burgohondo on their their shirts so that seems to be a big enough clue.

Picture: Arthur's boots which he is proud to say, have not been cleaned in two years.

A typically lazy start by Chapi saw the vistors take a quick free kick resulting in the ball flying over Joseph 2 into the top corner. Despite coming back ito the game it was late in the first half before who else but baby-face Robert leveled things. This was followed by Arthur challenging for ball near goal and for the second week running, slamming his head into the metal barrier surrounding the pitch. Once may be considered unfortunate but headbutting a hard metal object twice (in two weeks) appears to be bordering on carelessness.

Picture: Chapi team photo.

Anyway, this incident conspired to inspire Chapi, who took the lead just before half-time when Raphael chipped the keeper. The turning point in the game arrived part way through the second half when El Davo, who had been providing sterling defensive and attaking options down the right, was harshly judged to have conceded a penalty by scything down an opposing forward without the luxury of taking the ball. The resulting spot-kick slammed off the post and was thumped away by George 2.

Picture: If we looked this depressed going into the break winning, how will it be when we are losing?

From then on, it was all Chapi. Edu (Edward), the other foreigner (from Argentina) slotted home from short range and it was the baby-face show for the rest of the afternoon. A 25-yard piledriver was followed by two more and Chapi ran home comfortable 6-1 winners in the end.

Picture: Arthur with an ice pack following his head-banging.

Hard work of Burgohonda

2009-02-08T21:24:00.006+01:00

After a long absence, El Davo returns. Having suffered from some kind of virulent flu that left him coughing and spluttering for the best part of a month, El Davo finally felt well enough to don his Chapi strip and continue his adventures.

The day started well with Charles 1 issuing yet another set of kit. This is good except that our sports bags are getting increasingly full with the danger of finding rogue socks or half-eaten sandwiches in their depths.

Picture: happy Chapi bench with George 2, Luciano (El Negro) and Lewis 1.

So off we went in a league match against Burgohonda from neighbouring Ávila. The first few minutes elicited howls of laughter from the Chapi bench as Luciano (El Negro) had taken the field in his brand new shorts without finding the time to take off the labels (see picture).

A lazy start from Chapi led to the visitors taking an early lead which they held into the crucial introduction of El Davo. In fact, it was probably coincidence that goals from Baby-face (I think) and George 1 turned things around. So 2-1 at half-time.

Picture: Swarthy El Davo pre-match.

An increasingly ill-tempered match continued apace until Peter, charging into the box found himself (despite his substatioal bulk), launched through the air by an opposing defender. Baby-face converted the resulting penalty and all seemed over for the day. This was however until Joseph 2 in goal froze as a feeble header rolled past him into the net. Despite constant attacks and a combination of desperate defending and good luck, Chapi survived to win 3-2.

Picture: George 1 showing that where real Brits have a pint post-match, their Spanish equivilents prefer something more sophisticated and girlie.

Brass monkey stroll for Chapi

2009-01-11T18:25:00.025+01:00

A short drive down the infamous 'Carretera de los Pantanos' (road of the reservoirs) from Chapinería awaited the village of Villamantilla. The Chapimobile or several of them in fact, pulled up on a freezing morning with the temperature barely above zero.

Picture: a surprised Peter (with Lewis 1 on left) caught wearing his wife's tights.

Picture above: Pre-match banter

However, as we got got going, it was the same old story. Chapi quickly swept into a four goal lead with Arthur, baby-face Robert and George 1 on the scoresheet. Then, a quick free-kick on the right resulted in George 1 crossing for El Davo to sweep the ball past the lunging keeper.

Picture left: El Davo with Arthur

Half time quickly came and the second half became something of an exhibition with Joseph 2 handing his goalkeeping gloves to Pepe and patrolling the left wing albeit with practically no effect. Five more goals from Chapi and three consolations from our hosts resulted in a 10-3 victory and good preparation for more testing times ahead.

Unfortunately, our talisman Arthur (see picture with El Davo before the incident) pulled a groin muscle late on and may be out for a while.

Picture left: Edward heading for goal

Picture below: Arthur heading back across goal for George 1 (hovering) to nod home

By the way, George 1 is trying to get tickets for the Manchester United - Real Madrid match and also Liverpool - Inter Milan. If anyone can help, please let me know.

Chapi topple young vets

2009-01-04T18:30:00.013+01:00

Due to production difficulties (I forgot my camera and I hadn't realised my phone camera lens was blocked by what appeared to be bum fluff), no pictures are available of the last match involving El Davo against his home village of Robledo de Chavela. After previously rejecting El Davo, revenge was sweet as Chapi strolled to a 7-1 victory and El Davo gave the opposing captain a good kicking.

Anyway, to the present. It was a beautiful sunny Sunday morning (midday actually) as proud Chapi Vets took on the neighbouring village of Colmenar del Arroyo. It was clear from the outset that very few if any grey hairs were apparent in our opponents manes.

Picture above: Before the off, Lewis deciding he didn't like that ball.

In fact, the truth was that they seemed to be in their early twenties. And so they were, but what the hell. Anyway, Chapi quickly took the lead through baby-face Robert followed by a 'golazo' from Arthur chipping the keeper from 30 yards.

Picture: Lucas with a dramatic 'air' shot with the goal at his mercy.

The introduction of El Davo and the English style of tackling, caused some consternation in the opposing ranks yet elicited nothing but a seriously laconic expression from our hero.

Picture: Intense concentration on the Chapi Bench.

Going in 2-0 up, the game continued with Colmenar pressing but Chapi surviving and looking dangerous on the break. The third goal (from Arthur I think) was followed immediately by a defensive lapse to make it 3-1. A very late consolation from our hosts made the final score 3-2 and a fun day out was had by all.

Picture: George 2 apparently giving the V-sign to someone out of shot during the half-time break.

Also in the picture we have Charles 2 returning from a long-term injury, Lucas, Joseph 1, Peter, Lewis, Charles 1, George 1, Edward, George 2 and El Negro (Luciano).

Sodden Chapi hit double figures

2008-12-07T22:04:00.006+01:00

Picture: Joseph 2 during the pre-match warm-up

On a morning more typical of the west of Ireland than sunny Spain, Chapi took on local neighbours Navalagamella at slippery Chapi Stadium. In a match in which the hosts dominated throughout, at least sufficiently to win 10-1, it was low on tension albeit high on drizzle. The guests arriving without a goalkeeper, luckily found Chapi with two, so in the first half Joseph 2 managed well to only allow 6 goals to be thumped past him. Pepe, in the second half managed to limit the flow marginally despite being cheekily lobbed by Arthur late in the game.

Picture: half-time banter on the Chapi bench

Another highlight was El Davo rising like a salmon (or maybe an anchovy) to head home a left wing corner for goal number seven or eight. Shortly before the end, captain Charles showing solidarity with his drenched teamates, refused to come off the bench apparently because he had already showered.

This week's profile is baby-face Robert. Being unable to interview the young lad, I have no further information to impart (at least for the moment) except that he can run really fast.

Chapi league debut goal rush

2008-12-06T14:36:00.014+01:00

Chapi Vets debut in the recently formed Sierra Vets League started with the visit of Burgohondo from the neighbouring province of Ávila.

Picture: Captains and youthful-looking referee before the match.

Half-way through a low-key first-half saw Chapi trailing to a solitary opposing strike and things looked grim. However, for no apparent reason, all hell broke loose and goals flew in at both ends throughout the rest of the match.
So, at the final whistle, Chapi found themselves victors by 9-4 with usual suspects, baby-face Robert and Arthur on the score sheet plus others that have slipped my mind.
Picture: spot the ball competition entry.

This week's micro-profile is our sturdy and stout goalkeeper, Pepe. In an interview lasting around ten seconds before the match, I was able to ascertain that he sells toilets and related paraphernalia. So, in the interests of feeble humour, Pepe thought early on on that we were down the pan and going down the plughole but ended up flushed with pride at our comeback. So we bathed in our glory and didn't sink into depression.

I missed the last game due to work commitments and snow, but tomorrow morning we are off again!

Long name pueblo compendium

2008-11-15T18:52:00.011+01:00

Due to circumstances both within and outside of his control, El Davo has been absent for a while. In order to compensate for this widely felt hiatus, he now presents a compendium of the last three matches against teams with long names.

Cadalso de Los Vidrios Vets 0 - 4 Chapi Vets
Firstly, in a routine demolition typical of our rampant heroes, Chapi overcame Cadalso de Los Vidrios Vets 4-0. It would have been more, except that normally reliable baby-face Robert must have put his Johnny Wilkinson shooting boots on. Consequently, many a shot was dispatched in to various back gardens and onto various garage rooves rather into the gaping net. Pictures were at a premium (in fact none were taken) as only eleven enthusiastic Chapionians made it and El Davo spent 90 minutes patrolling (with some aplomb) the left side of midfield.

Villaviciosa de Odón Vets 5 - 6 Chapi Vets
In a bad-tempered end-to-end encounter, Chapi found themselves 2-0, 3-1 and 4-2 up only to be pegged backed to 4-4 half-way through the second half. Then, the unexpected happened. El Davo, nominally playing right-back, appeared at the near post to baby-face Robert's left wing corner and bundled both the ball and the opposing left-back into the net. Overcome by emotion, El Davo limped off shortly afterwards only to witness two disputed penalties (one for each side) and a severe case of handbag hurling as both teams traded insults. Luckily for El Davo, he could understand little of what the fuss was about except to the various references to self abuse and parts of both the male and female anatomy. Again, no pictures were available due to El Davo bringing the camera but leaving the battery at home.

San Martin de Valdeiglesias 3 - 3 Chapi Vets

Picture: Arthur seemingly vaulting an imaginary stationary object while Joseph 1 hovers like an uncoiled spring on the edge of the 6 yard box.

Chapi came up against a strong San Martin side at picturesque San Martin Stadium. El Davo quickly realised that either the other 21 players had suddenly become capable of running considerably faster than average, or he had slowed down substantially since his heyday in the days of pounds, shillings and pence.
Picture: Baby-face Robert stokes in his second penalty with only marginal encroachment by George and Arthur.

In any case, Chapi battled well to lead 1-0, 2-1 and 3-2 only to concede late on to what was in fairness, a deserved equaliser by our friendly hosts.

Hangover Chapi scrape it

2008-10-12T18:08:00.014+02:00

Picture: intense midfield battle

Fresh from that glorious victory over Rayo Valecano Vets the previous weekend, Chapi Vets came down to earth with a tepid display against Piedralaves Vets who made the 50km trek from the distant Gredos mountains way out west. With a name translated apparently as 'stone washes' our guests played well above the level that their varied and uncoordinated styles of kit would have suggested.

Playing in the first half like a bunch of strangers, Chapi unsurprisingly went one down close to the interval. George 2 gave everyone (particularly the ineffective midfield and attack) a half-time bollocking which obligingly coincided with a torrential downpour. Slightly more on the ball in the second half, Joseph 1 headed home to put our sodden heroes level before a superb cross from Peter (who insisted later it was a shot) sailed over the diminuative opposing keeper into the far corner. So 2-1 it was for the second week running but a sudden realisation that we are just a bunch of Sunday morning footballers like all the others. Well almost, there's only one Chapi!.

Picture: El Davo with shortlived smug smile

See below rare pictures of El Davo in action as he is usually the cameraman. Pay special attention to second picture where goalkeeper Joseph 2 seems to have been abducted by aliens because none of us noticed he wasn't there! Also, the third picture shows typical El Davo close marking. I think the winger was off the the left - but then again it could be to the right. Note a confused looking Joseph 2 landing after being teleported.

Little Chapi humble ex-pros

2008-10-04T22:09:00.029+02:00

An historic evening at a typically balmy Chapi Stadium, in front of a crowd of at least 200 partisan supporters, saw Chapi Vets take on the mighty Rayo Vallecano Vets in a specially arranged friendly match.

Picture: swapping of memorabilia.

The visitors, consisting entirely of ex-professionals with experience in the higher Spanish leagues, provided a stern test for the bunch of car mechanics, lorry drivers, cigarette salesmen and one English teacher turning out for the team in blue. Yet, Chapi were not daunted or overawed but performed illustriously and with passion. A baby-face Robert strike late in the first half saw Chapi retire to the Chapi room in confident move but wary of the potential from so many talented feet.

Picture below: Opposing Captains pre-match pose

El Davo, shared the right back slot with Lewis 2 (see last week's profile), playing the second half of each half (if that makes sense) . With the defence solid, the midfield inventive and the attack penetrating, it seemed impossible to add more clichés.

Newcomer John slammed a second with 15 minutes to go before Rayo pulled one almost immediately. With a last throw of the dice, Rayo pitted a winger against El Davo that looked as if he could run the 100m in about 2 seconds. However, our heroes held on to provoke jubilation in the crowd more than partly fueled by the proximity of the open-air bar.

Picture: Packed Chapi Kop

An somewhat optimistic suggestion during the usual after-match shower ritual was to take on Barcelona next week at the Nou Camp. More likely, it will be a local village. just up the road.

Picture: Pepe Guarding the Chapi goal.

Picture below: Post-match photo of the famous protagonists.

Chapi comeback in hard-fought draw

2008-09-26T18:45:00.011+02:00

A strong Cadalso de los Vidrios Vets team visited Chapi Stadium on yet another sunny Sunday morning and soon raced into a 2-0 lead. George 1 pulled one back after Baby-face (I think) banged one onto the crossbar. Going in 1-2 down Chapi raced out for the second half only to be pinned back at 3-1 and 4-2. However, late strikes by Baby-face and Arthur secured a proud draw against illustrious opponents.

Picture: Rafael and unknown opponent take time out for a dance during a hectic first half.

A post-match paella party enhanced with ample wine allowed our Spanish patriots to cheer on Rafael Nadal to victory in the Davis Cup over Andy Roddick. As for an English definition of paella (pronounced, pa-a-ya), it's a load of rice laced with an indeterminate number and variety of stuff vaguely resembling something edible. This could range from the tentacle from some deceased sea creature to something the cat brought in (or the dog threw up).

This week's profile is Luis 2, a steady full back who rarely ventures further than an area of about 10 square metres on the Chapi right flank. Father to a 5-year-old little girl, Luis works erecting (and presumably un-erecting) stage sets for TV programs and films. Luis continually displays an air of being completely shagged out, and hides his stamina in such a way that he looks equally exhausted at the end of the game as at the start.

Lucky thirteen for Chapi in goal spree

2008-09-14T21:20:00.023+02:00

On a sunny early autumn morning at picturesque Chapi stadium, Chapi Vets destroyed Burgohondo Vets 13-1 in an unstoppable display of fluid passing movements and clinical finishing. A performance practically bereft of running round in circles and falling over for no reason, impressed a partisan crowd, two of who were dragged off the terraces to supplement the squad. Baby-face Robert and Arthur garnered the majority of the goals ably supported by newcomer Oscar and George 1.

Picture above: Chapi Vets before the demolition.

An attempt to take a photo of Joseph ended in failure possibly due to his not inconsiderable girth having a gravitational effect on the photons which were somehow diverted around the camera lens. The picture below was taken the week after following the fitting the 'ample belly anti-gravity' device to El Davo's camera.

Picture: El Davo in confident mood.

On another note, the match capped an eventful week in which El Davo lost his identity card (a cardinal sin in Spain), the dishwasher bust (a major disaster anywhere), and El Davo was invited to a soirée at the British Ambassador's residence (where no Ferrera Rocher chocolates were served as it turned out). The invitation was unfortunately was not due to the Ambassador being an El Davo fan - at least not yet.

Picture: 19-year-old El Davito (little El Davo) at the hospital before the escape.

On the basis that teenage boys have a natural tendency to stick their fingers where they shouldn't, El Davito managed to place said digit in the cylinder of a petrol lawn mower and then turn the engine. He was unsurprisingly surprised to find that the piston nearly took the end of his finger off. A trip to hospital followed which was going well until El Davito was told the wound needed to be stapled at which point he did a runner. No amount of persuasion would convince him to go back inside so away we went back home where following a valium, he at least consented to have a tetanus jab.

This week's profile (see note above - mentioned ample belly in evidence) is Joseph. A jovial giant, Joseph is equally at home in goal or shoring up the sometimes less than formidable Chapi defence. Father to a five-year-old little boy, Joseph works in something to do with road signs or notices or something like that. Unfortunately, Joseph's lack of English and El Davo's limited road sign vocabulary caused something of a communication breakdown.

El Davo in the Human Race

2008-09-07T11:40:00.016+02:00

In the absence of Chapi matches, El Davo rather foolishly entered Nike's 'Human Race' 10K race in Madrid on 31 August. It should have been obvious that August in Madrid can get a trifle on the warmish side but seemingly oblivious to such concerns, El Davo turned up in tasteful Nike T-Shirt (along with 15,000 other masochists) to pace the streets from El Retiro Park to that well-known transvestite haunt, Casa de Campo (another park). These crap videos do not continue beyond around two thirds of the way through the race as beyond this point, El Davo had considerable challenges in raising either arm above his waist.

The start in El Retiro and then getting Puffed at 2.5K

Trudging past the Prado Museum and onto Puerta del Sol

On another topic, I hear on the grapevine that it's been a little damp back home this summer. Well, just to let everyone know that it also rained here last Friday night for an hour or so. The important difference though is that the last time it did was in the middle of June!

Chapi Last Match Salamanca Bashing

2008-07-13T12:33:00.019+02:00

For reasons that remain unclear to El Davo, Chapi Vets last game of the season took place in a small village near Salamanca some two and a half hours drive away from home and not so far from Portugal. The journey there was uneventful except for Rafael 2 having to unload (in a petrol station toilet) some dodgy prawns he had the night before. Arthur's frequent requests for comfort breaks also slowed down the progress of the Chapi convoy. Finally, after spotting and roaring past the gleaming spires of fair Salamanca, we trundled down a winding road through flat featureless countryside until we reached our destination.

Picture above: Assembled Chapi Vets in deceptively confident mood before the match.

Despite the village of Galindo y Perahuy looking like a two-horse town with one horse on holiday, their vets team has a fearful reputation with rumours of some ex-pros among their ranks. In order to prevent a colour clash, Chapi considerately swopped their usual light-blue shirts for a slightly less blue strip. Fortunately, the opposition played in black and white. The stadium was only slightly full but was augmented by some rather bored looking cattle in a field opposite. So, after a swift warm up and further exercise swatting the myriad of flying insects, off we went.

Picture: Chapi old lags El Davo and Lewis 1.

Although unaccustomed to playing on real grass, Chapi raced into a two goal lead with strikes from Arthur and baby-faced Robert. However, it didn't last. G y P turned on the heat and smashed four goals past a helpless Joseph to reach the interval leading 4-2. As Chapi kicked off the second half down the slight slope, their fortunes also continued to take a downhill turn. G y P scored three further goals to finish worthy
winners by 7-2.

Picture: Charles and the Galino y Perahuy captain after the presentation of the ceremonial plaque.

After the match, the team decided that a fairer result would have been 5-2 so that's the way it will remain in our memories if not in reality. Our friendly hosts invited us for post-match beer and nibbles before we set off for Madrid around 10:15pm. Unfortunately, Lewis 1 took us back on a somewhat circuitous route which seemed at one point to put us closer to France than Madrid and which was at one point punctuated by Peter and George 1 relieving themselves over some unfortunate's garden fence. El Davo reached home at 1:15am and crashed out some seconds later.

Picture: Assembled Chapi players in the bar. Left background: Lewis 1, Arthur: Standing, Joseph, Luciano (El Negro): Sitting, George 1, George 2 and Rafael 2.

Reports of Chapi Vets matches will take a hiatus during the balmy (or rather roasting) remainder of July and August although El Davo will attempt to post regularly, detailing interesting details of Spanish rural life and associated nonsenses.

This week's profile is George 2. A cultured central defender, George is well-known for his pleasant manner on and off the field except when on the bench when he goes bonkers. George lives in central Madrid with his wife who will give birth to their first child in January. He works as a sweet salesman (in both senses) and along with Arthur (who sells tobacco) is proud to be contributing to the health of the nation.

Towers is not faulty for Spain

2008-07-06T20:20:00.007+02:00

Picture left Spanish Patriotism before the game.
Picture right: El Davo ready to go

Chapi Vets very considerately ensured they did not have a game on Sunday 29 June so as not distract the Spanish public from the European Championship Final. El Davo festooned in Spanish Team shirt strolled down to the town square which was decked out in yellow and red and sported a large screen for the locals to enjoy the moment. Perhaps I should mention that the screen although large for a small one-bedroomed flat, did look a little insufficient for such a large area. It was reasonably easy to distinguish the small fast-running Spaniards from the towering Germans, it was just a little difficult to spot the ball. So, El Davo went home at half-time and soon after celebrated Mr Fernando Towers (or Torres for the Spanish folks) sticking one past the German keeper. Fireworks and a considerable amount of alcoholic beverages followed the final whistle and everyone said how much they missed England - just wait until next time, if we qualify that is.

Picture: Plaza de España in Robledo de Chavela during the game.

Sweaty Chapi swelter to victory over depraved small town

2008-06-22T20:03:00.006+02:00

Picture: Half-time recuperation, Lewis 2, Rafael 1, Peter and Baby-faced Robert.

As the thermometer cranked up to around 30 Degrees, Chapi took the field at Chapi Stadium against renown opponents Villaviciosa de Odón (translated as 'small depraved town of Odón). To the surprise of Chapi, the visiting players presented their opponents with engraved 'depraved small town pens' as a gesture of respect. They then retreated back to the changing room from where we heard what sounded like a 'Haka'. Scary!
Picture: More half-time recuperation, Rafael 2, George and Joseph.

Anyway, with Charles at the beach and George 2 AWOL, El Davo lined up at the back with Lucas and off we went. Baby-faced Robert (or Billy-Whizz) soon raced passed various static defenders to put Chapi 1-0 up. This was followed by Peter, who despite his stout stature, sprinted down the right and powered home. Another from Baby-face made it 3-0 and all looked a little too easy. However, a 25 yard piledriver flashed past Joseph to bring Villaviciosa back into it and then Joseph dragged down (allegedly) an opposing forward only to save the resulting penalty - it's all happening at Chapi Stadium.

A tense second half resulted in several players wilting in the heat but El Davo soldiered on and only once fell over for no reason. Villaviciosa pulled another back but Chapi held on for a hard-earned victory.

This week's profile is Luciano (El Negro). A sinewy, lithe, skillful player, Luciano plays full-back or wide midfield and always has a smile of encouragement for his less lithe teamates. A lorry driver in the construction industry, Luciano is well-known arriving at the game sporting various injuries after falling off the back of his truck. Having a daughter (11) and son (16) Luciano probably has a little more energy for the game than Rafael 1 (see last week's entry).

Información para jugadores de Chapi sobre el 'tour' a belgica 2009

2008-06-22T17:38:00.020+02:00

Aquí es una traducción (por Google) de un mensaje de correo electrónico de Willy (El Organizador) y fotos del evento de este año . El original en Inglés está por debajo.
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Hola El Davo

Primero permítame decirle que usted acerca de este evento año: es grande. He oído que usted piensa, y por supuesto, ... no puede decir lo contrario! Pero para probarlo, basta con visitar nuestro sitio web: www.veteranen-millen.be Que haga clic en la foto, que selecciona lo último. También un montón de fotos en el sitio de Zeus FC, un equipo del Reino Unido de Southend on Sea: http://www.zeusfc.co.uk/tour2008.htm
Más información sobre el sitio web de la banda que tocaba a viernes: http://www.theboozers.be/pictures/2008.php

Este año tuvimos 124 equipos, la mayoría de ellos procedentes de Bélgica, sino también de 4 de Reino Unido, 3 de Alemania, 2 de Francia y 6 de los Países Bajos. Nuestro objetivo en 2009 (nuestro 40a aniversario) es que también algunos equipos de España, Italia y Dinamarca o Suecia. Por esto yo realmente espero que usted y sus amigos, o incluso a otros equipos de España realmente puede hacer que nuestro evento! Sería muy bueno como nunca ha tenido siempre un equipo de España.

Primero que tenemos que resolver: los viajes! ¿Cómo llegar? Bruselas aeropuerto principal? Brussels South Charleroi? Segunda cosa es la fechas de viaje ....Mejor cosa para que su equipo se volaba a cabo el jueves 21 de mayo, y el regreso el domingo 24 de Mayo.
Luego está el problema de hotel, hostal, o de otro tipo de alojamiento. Simplemente por la Juventud Hostal en Tongeren unos 7 km de nuestros campos! Como ustedes saben, los jóvenes hostal es muy básica, a veces hasta 8 personas por habitación. Pero este Hostal en Tongeren es una muy buena! Los precios son 19 euros por persona y por noche, desayuno incluido Por lo tanto, 3 noches de estancia costará 57 euros. Nuestro equipo se encargará de descuento en todos los alimentos en jueves, viernes y sabado noche a nuestra los gastos. Lo unico que tiene que cuidar de almuerzo es al mediodía!
Número de juegos depende de usted y el equipo de compañeros: 1 juego un día es posible, con un partido contra el equipo del Reino Unido , un equipo belga, un equipo alemán! Todavía tenemos mucho tiempo para ir hasta el mes de mayo, pero podría ser bueno sólo para comprobar en todos los posibilidades.
Algunas preguntas de mi lado:
* ¿Se puede averiguar los vuelos España-Bélgica?
* ¿Se puede transmitir toda la información a los demás equipo español, ya que mi conocimiento de español es "nada"!
Por lo tanto, Dave, póngase en contacto conmigo lo antes posible de nuevo! Vamos a tratar de ayudarle con todo lo que estás preguntas y problemas, ... sólo tratar de llegar magificiente para un fin de semana! Dí lo a tus jugadores pueden visitar Bélgica, Holanda y Alemania en un viaje!

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First, let me tell you about this years event: it was great. I hear you think, well of course, ... he can't say otherwise!But to prove it, just visit our website: www.veteranen-millen.be Then click on photos, than select Happening.Also a lot of pics on the site of FC Zeus, an UK based team from Southend-on- Sea: http://www.zeusfc.co.uk/tour2008.htm More on the website from the band that played on friday: http://www.theboozers.be/pictures/2008.php This year we had 124 teams, most of them from Belgium, but also 4 from UK, 3 from Germany, 2 from France and 6 from the Netherlands.Our aim in 2009 (our 40th anniversary) is to get also some teams from Spain, Italy and Denmark or Sweden. Therefor I really hope you and your friends, or even other teams from Spain really can make it to our event! It would be great as we never ever had a team from Spain.First thing we have to sort out: travel! How to get here? Brussels Main Airport? Brussels South Charleroi?Second thing is the travel dates....Best thing for your team would be flying out on Thursday 21 may, and return on Sunday 24 May. Then there is the problem of hotel, or youth hostel, or other sort of accommodation.I just went by the Youth Hostel in Tongeren some 7 km from our pitches! As you know, youth hostal is very basic, sometimes up to 8 people per room.But this Hostel in Tongeren is a very good one!Prices are 19 euro per person per night, breakfast includedSo 3 night stay would cost 57 euro. Our team will take care off all foods on Thursday, Friday and Saturday evening on our expenses.Only thing you have to take care of is lunch at noon!Number of games is up to you and the team mates: 1 game a day is possible, with a game against UK team (OP maybee...), one agianst Belgian team, one German team! We still have a long time to go untill may, but I might be good just to check on all possibilities

Some questions from my side:

* Did you contact the OP team already?

* Can you find out flights Spain-Belgium?

* Can you pass on all info to the other Spanish team, as my knowledge of Spanish is "nada"! So Dave, please contact me again asap!!! We will try to help you with all you're questions and problems, ... just try to get here for a magificent week-end!! Tell your players they can visit Belgium, Netherlands and Germany in one trip!

Allegedly youthful Chapi clobber Seville the New

2008-06-09T00:08:00.014+02:00

Video: en route to the match and two excellent highlights.

A leisurely half-hour drive from Chapinería saw Chapi vets take the stage at Sevilla la Nueva (Seville the New) Stadium. A big pitch could have proved intimidating to old lags such as the two Lewis's and El Davo but Chapi are made of stern stuff and raced into a 2-0 lead prompted by baby-faced Robert who's ability to run twice as fast as anyone else on the pitch with the possible exception of Arthur, caused considerable confusion in both teams. El Davo, brought on after 20 minutes at right-back was switched to left-wing in the mistaken belief that he could emulate Robert's pace. A number of over hit through balls left our hero puffing and panting to no effect other than giving Arthur the opportunity to heckle from the bench.

El Davo started the second half by head butting (accidentally) an opposing player which clearly disconcerted the opposition sufficiently to allow Arthur to put Chapi 3-0 up. This was followed by a spell of play which saw the Chapi defence repeatedly passing to the opposition or falling over for no apparent reason and inevitably led to Seville the New getting a goal back.

However, three further strikes from the Arthur-Robert axis ensured an emphatic 6-1 victory. Complaints from Seville the New vets that Robert was not really 47 but was still at school was followed by accusations that his 5 o'clock shadow was painted on with felt tip pen. This was not true of course and unrelated to his mum picking him after the game and chastising him for not having done his homework.

This week's profile. Rafael 1. A skilled two-footed mid-fielder (as opposed to one-footed mid-fielders), Rafael provides the link between Chapi's sometimes less than impenetrable defence and potent attack (consisting of pretty much Arthur on his own).

A car mechanic by trade, Rafael moved a few years ago from the inner-city cowboy country of Carabanchel in Madrid to the cowboy country of the Madrid Sierra.

Rafael has spent enough time at home to father five children and still has sufficient energy to sprint around the pitch for 90 minutes (see him in action in the video!).

Welcome to 'El Davo in El Spaino' video

2008-06-01T17:12:00.008+02:00

Well, here is El Davo's first amateur attempt at video and a welcome to the World. Please do not write in complaining about his butchering of the Spanish language - this is a daily occurrence. Similarly, any resemblance of El Davo to Alice Cooper or even Al Pacino is accidental and comment on such is generally unwelcome as is references to chewing straw and suspicious incidents with unwilling sheep. Apologies for the crap camera work, the responsibility of son of El Davo number II, AKA Christopher (or fat boy). Hopes are high that we can bring you live action of Chapi's next encounter away at "Seville the New". I can't wait either!

Arthur brace puts Chapi crocks back on track

2008-06-01T16:35:00.007+02:00

The visit of Las Navas del Marqués to Chapi stadium saw our favourite Spanish vets team return to winning ways. The return of Lewis 1 after injury boded well and an opener (by someone?) was followed by a Charles rocket from a short corner putting Chapi in control. Unfortunately, a period of mid-summer madness saw our determined opponents score twice in a 10 minute spell shortly after half-time leaving George 2 apoplectic with rage on the bench. Our idols were suddenly on the rack.

But, despite knee injuries to Charles and Francis, the George-Lucas pairing was directing the midfield and Arthur (yet again!) fired in from the edge of the box. With time running out, and with El Davo distracting the opposing defence by running around in circles to no obvious purpose, Arthur rose to head home a corner and seal the win.

A new feature will be a weekly profile of Chapi players, starting with talisman - Arthur!
When he's not banging them in for Chapi, Arthur works as a tobacco salesman (sounds like an easy job over here given that most of the population seem to be puffing away morning till night).

He is well accustomed to holding the ball up while leaden-legged midfielders amble upfield and is well-versed in the latin art of writhing in agony one minute while sprinting onto a through pass a few seconds later.

Short-handed Chapi slip up again

2008-05-25T19:40:00.011+02:00

Another Saturday afternoon kick-off saw Chapi preparing to take the field against Moralzarzal Vets (try saying that with a gob full of wine gums) with only eight players. Apparently, the lure of barbecues and the necessity of attending drunken Spanish weddings had whittled the available protagonists down considerably. After dragging some bloke off the terraces (who looked uncannily like Goldmember from the Austin Powers movie) to play full back, Francis, George and talisman Arthur arrived as the teams were warming up.

A cagey first half saw Chapi go behind as a long cross eluded Joseph 1 and was headed home by the Moralzarzal centre-forward. Shortly after the break, a characteristic defensive mix-up saw Chapi go further behind until who else but Arthur struck twice to give our idols hope. Unfortunately, further away days by the Chapi rearguard gifted our talented guests two further scores. So a 4-2 defeat but not a bad performance and a nice sunny day between the continuing downpours we've been having recently. Don't have have any match pics due to being forced to play the whole 90 minutes - could be why I can't walk today!
While having a coffee with Luciano (El Negro) before the match, I mentioned cricket. He asked whether that was the game played on horses. Well, to put matters straight, here's a pic of El Davo before his recent reincarnation playing at Madrid Cricket Club with Jonathan from Stony Stratford behind the stumps.

At my appearance in the bar for post-match drinkies, and while Francis was getting severely tanked up, George asked why there was no Spanish content on the blog. So, from now on you may find the odd (probably grammically incorrect) dagoism popping up.

Slack Chapi Battered

2008-05-23T07:31:00.009+02:00

Picture: Lucas bearing down on goal with Francis pleading for a pass.

Despite the return of Arthur, Chapi suffered a heavy defeat (6-3) at the hands of an efficient San Martin de ValdeIglesias vets team. That's sixteen goals conceded in the last three games and diminutive keeper Joseph 2 gave the team a post-match lambasting as we queued for the red hot or freezing shower (see earlier post) This is despite him regularly being lobbed from the half-way line by enterprising opposing mid-field players.

Anyway, Chapi stadium was packed (relatively) with curious onlookers and the odd domestic animal on a balmy spring morning. Chapi started off as un-coordinated as a very drunk un-coordinated person overdosed on Valium and consistently maintained this standard throughout. Suffice to say that El Davo has forgotten many details of the match other than his clumsy challenge on one of the opponent's silky midfield players. After flattening said silky individual who had been asking for it (for being a bit good), El Davo had to be be dragged back to show concern for his prostrate victim. It's all a bit different over here.

Interesting fact from Spain. Football vocabulary is Spanish is very similar to that of the Home Counties. For example: football=futbol, corner=corner, penalty=penalti, goal=gol. So, Spanish is easy, it's just a matter of reorganising the vowels. As for "on me 'ed" or "give it welly", I'll need to check the dictionary.

Golfing El Davo impersonater in Spanish press

2008-05-15T18:10:00.008+02:00

Those who really know El Davo will not be fooled. Would he really be seen playing a girly, pansy-like game such as golf? And in that sleeveless cardigan! Rumours abound but the most popular theory is that an old-time rock singer, snake-wrestler and devourer of live rats spotted the El Davo blog and climbed on the bandwagon trading makeup for El Davo's current clean-cut look. You have to respect the man but there's only one El Davo. Full details here!

Chapi comeback kids brave the downpour

2008-05-10T21:03:00.024+02:00

Picture: Chapi Midfield dynamo Francis (Paco) in the middle of his traditional El Davo (or El inglés) pre-match insult. Usually something about tea drinking and how Gibraltar is Spanish - yeah, dream on!

On another typical English day in Spain, dark clouds and bucketing rain could not prevent brave Chapi from coming from behind three times to eventually defeat Cenicientos Vets 5-4 in a thrilling encounter at Chapi Stadium. An atypical Saturday afternoon kick-off saw Chapi go a goal down in the first few minutes. In a surprisingly skillfull spell, a goal was pulled back only for their dogged opponents to pull ahead again. Further goals for each side before the break saw Chapi trailing 3-2 at half-time.

However, the swift introduction of El Davo for the second half gave Chapi the spirit needed to equalise and despite conceding again, two goals late on meant that Chapi were back on winning ways. As for the scorers, well, prolific Arthur was absent but newcomer Robert scored at least one. As for the rest, as Chapi all play in the same coloured shirts (strange but true), it's often difficult to tell which swarthy Spaniard got the final touch. Eyesite fading or Alzeimers approaching - not sure which.

Interesting fact from Spain. El Davito (little El Davo) now nearly 19 years-old and at 14 arguably the youngest ever Old Pretenders player is bent on becoming the stereotypical wayward teenager and attention seeker. Here he is below pictured with José Bono, ex-Spanish Defence Minister and now leader of the Spanish Parliament who he collared while the unsuspecting big nob popped out for the milk. Not sure Mr Bono quite understood the T-shirt message.

Also below you can see him posing next to Santiago Segura, Spain's answer to Austin Powers (see poster) and rabid Atletico Madrid supporter (Fernando Torres played a cameo in his last film!)

Battling Chapi comeback not enough

2008-05-02T06:29:00.005+02:00

Picture: Lewis's 1 and 2 plus Michael enthusiastically cheering on their team.

El Davo, back from his hamstring injury, contributed - in truth hardly anything - to a thrilling battle at Chapi Stadium against a formidable Boadilla del Monte side. Two-nil adrift inside ten minutes and 5-1 down shortly before half-time, Chapi battled on and went 6-2 down shortly after the break as Joseph in goal, watched a Boadilla midfielder bang one in over his bonce from near the half-way line.

Two strikes from the irrepresible Arthur (yes, 6-4 in the end), brought a a degree of respectability to a contest that saw the end of Chapi's long unbeaten run.

Congrats to Chelsea and Man Utd for reaching the Chapions League final. I was desperately trying to follow the Man U-Barça tie on the mobile phone on the train home from work. A surprisingly large bunch of Madridians support the Catalans, but the hard core Real Madrid fans (like me, have you seen my Real Madrid credit card?), are glad they were dumped out by Scholesy's scorcher.

As for the interesting fact from Spain, today is my birthday (and Beckam's) and also a national holiday here as an annual commemoration of some battle in Madrid when the Spaniards gave the frogs a hammering. Luckily not every anniversary of a French defeat results in a holiday or we'd hardly ever go to work!

Photos to follow when I find my phone!

Hamstrung El Davo capsizes as Chapi roll on

2008-04-06T14:37:00.005+02:00

Picture: El Davo before the callapse

Well, games are coming thick and fast. A regulation 4-2 victory last Sunday against Cadalso de Los Vidrios (translated apparently as "the place made of glass where you can watch people being executed") was followed today by a game against Sevilla La Nueva (or new Seville) who strangely did not play in orange. The introduction of two new players (George and Lucas) ensured we played like stars in the first half and went in 3-2 up..

Another Arthur strike soon after was followed by disaster for El Davo. Sprinting on to a pass inside the fullback, El Davo pulled up, rolled around a bit and then dragged himself to the side of the pitch with his face buried in the artificial grass. Well, another hamstring injury and a rush to get fit for the next game. Anyway, we were 4-2 up as I limped to the car and drove home so here's hoping it's another victory in the bag.

On another topic, I've been contacted by Willy Hauben about the vets tournament in Belgium. He's obviously following the OPs as he got my email from the website. Anyway, Chapi are keen to participate next year. It would be nice to see the OPS there as well!

Wallets, Curries, Beer and (nearly) missed flights

2008-03-10T17:46:00.003+01:00

With no match over last weekend and a trip to Blighty planned, a relaxing time was forseen. Unfortunately, things started badly on Thursday night when my wallet could not be found. The three Euros inside were less of a concern than the credit cards and most importantly, my identity card. In Spain, without an ID card it's virtually impossible to do anything.

Friday morning dawned with the house in a shambles and a number of interesting objects relocated, most of which were found down the back of the sofa - but alas, not the wallet. A phone call solved the mystery - my wallet had been picked up on my Thursday night train by a nice lady. All I had to do was travel down to lawless south Madrid to pick it up on the way to the airport. This accomplished, the flight landed on time and I was picked up by my mate Russ who I hadn't seen for 18 years. A nice chat in a nice pub with a nice beer or two followed and we talked about old times including the occasion when a much younger El Davo (perhaps El Davito) extremely drunk was thrown out of a moving car (driven by flatmate Steve) shortly after throwing up indirectly over Russ and two rather butch German ladies lodged in the back.

Letting myself into Mother's flat was shortly proceded by a Lamb Rogan from the local Indian Takeaway. Saturday passed uneventfully with a family lunch and stocking up on Cadbury's chocolate eggs and giant packs of Horlicks from Tesco's. Feet up for Match of the Day watching Barnsley triumph over Chelsea while munching a Chicken Madras from aforementioned takeaway completed a satisfying day.

Sunday started with toast followed by cheese on toast, and toast. The lift to the airport from my ex-sister-in-law's boyfriend was going fine until my mother rang to say I had left a bag and my glasses behind. A rapid u-turn and Sunday lunch-time traffic meant that I arrived at good old Bristol Airport 20 minutes before the flight was due to leave. Pushing my way past queues of dawdling school kids and barging in front of a poor lady in a wheel chair I reached the X-ray detecter thing. Of course, my bag was pulled and apparently VO5 hair gel is considered to be part of every terrorist's armoury. Less the hair gel but considerably closer to a heart attack I sprinted to the gate launched myself up the steps to the plane.

Finally getting home after being verbally abused on the Metro by some dork who thought I was a Rumanian people smuggler, I followed the misfortune of the Pirates (Bristol Rovers) getting stuffed at home by bloody West Brom in the FA Cup.

This was all the more poignant due to my brother being a recent West Brom season ticker holder and his son (my nephew) signing schoolboy forms with the baggies before their home league game next weekend.

More news when I regain my sanity!

Once again! - Chapi Stadium Resurrection

2008-02-24T16:23:00.007+01:00

Picture: Opposing captains speculate on where the bloody sun has gone.

A typical English February morning (except it was Spain) welcomed our heroic Chapi team back into action in a friendly in the impressive Chapi Stadium. Against a spirited but initially disorganised Villanueva de Perales Vets, Chapi raced into a 3-0 lead until over-confidence at the back allowed the visitors to sneak a goal just before half-time. An end-to-end second half with the aged Chapi legs feeling the strain, Villanueva scored twice to pile on the pressure. Despite an Arthur strike putting some distance between the teams, Villanueva once again pulled one back only to be finally sunk in the last minute as El Davo (yes, El Davo) took a pass from Arthur and despite doing his best to let the opposing keeper save, saw his shot spin off the keepers gloves into the corner.

Picture left: Chapi Stadium

Picture right: Damp Chapi Vets, Rafael 1, Rafael 2, El Davo, Charles 1, Stand-in Joseph, Arthur, injured Joseph, Michael, Peter, Lewis, Francis and El Negro.

Interesting fact from Spain. The word 'once' in English translates to 'eleven' in Spanish. So, the heading 'Once Again' can mean 'Once Again' as in Chapi playing once again, or in Spanglish, 'Eleven Again' meaning not football sevens but football elevens. If you know what I mean!

Sensation as Chapi booted out for ref abuse

2008-02-17T13:23:00.002+01:00

It seems like the shenanigans of the previous week and the girlie nature of match officials has resulted in our well-loved Chapinería 12 being unceremoniously expelled from the Navalcarnero Futbol Siete league. All dressed up and nowhere to go in our six piece training and playing kit, we walk the street kicking empty Coke cans and the odd stray cat. Moves are afoot to arrange friendly games with local villages and thanks to the excellent state of Chapi Stadium we expect to be revived and kicking before long.

As for El Davo, he has been treating his dodgy calves with the 'stick' (wwwthestick.com) and is planning a regimen of running up and down the Sierra in preparation for future challenges.

Keep tuned!

George sees red as Chapi trip up in handbag finalé

2008-02-08T10:30:00.000+01:00

Under uncharacteristically leaden skies, 3rd placed Chapi took on 2nd placed C.F Casarubios in what turned out to be a bruising encounter. Going one down to an early goal and with talisman Arthur marked out of the game by tough-tackling opponents, it was left to George to fire in a long shot to keep Chapi in the game at 1-1 at half-time.

Going behind again early in the second half, Chapi responded well and once again George restored parity with another stormer. In a game geting increasingly bad-tempered, Chapi withstood a barrage of attacks from Casarubios with the ball pinging from both posts and the crossbar. Just as it seemed escape was in the offing, a dreamy move from Casarubios ended with a sweet volley sailing past Rafael 2 into the corner to go 3-2 up.

With time running out, Chapi forged forward in search of an equaliser and George broke clear only to be bundled down by a defender. Somewhat piqued by not even getting a free kick, George told the referee (translated literally from Spanish) "go to the shit". In Spanish this does not mean go to a specific shit, but is a general insult. The referee responded with (again literally translated) "go the street". This does not mean go and stand in the road, it means 'sorry mate, you're off'.

Pandemonium then ensued and handbags were swung by both sides. Even normally mild-mannered Lewis despite being similarly ancient to El Davo, had to be retrained from laying one on one of our considerably younger opponents. The referee having apparently decided this was all too silly, blew for time and both sides drifted back to the changing rooms paradoxically trading a mixture of handshakes and insults.

Interesting fact from Spain: The Spanish word for 'bunged up' or congested when you have a cold is 'constipado'. This results in many Spanish tourists to the UK asking in the pharmacy for a cure for 'constipation 'when they have a cold. Consequently, a runny nose might not be all they get.

Hard-fought win for Sleepy Chapi

2008-01-27T16:44:00.000+01:00

Picture: Rafael and opponent challenging for what is presumably the ball.

On yet another sunny Sunday morning - I have yet to see a cloud of any significance this season - Chapi made hard work of beating tight-marking opponents Herance A-R 4-1 despite dominating proceedings. Early pressure led to a chance for George who managed to put his shot completely out of the ground and onto a nearby building site. El Davo, well-used to retrieving wild shots from his OP days, bounded over the locked gates in pursuit. Approaching half-time, Arthur finally slotted home to put sluggish Chapi ahead.

The second half started more promisingly as first an Arthur scorcher bulged the net and then a speculative Peter shot went in via a defender and the post to put our heroes 3-0 up. However, shortly afterwards, the Chapi defence went AWOL and an Herance forward jogged upfield and slotted the ball past stand-in keeper Francis. Stung into action, silky passing moves from Chapi eventually took their toll and Arthur took a pass from Rafael to score from close range.

Picture: Unclear to what is happening but assume that Arthur is not stooping to kiss opposing keeper's backside. Looks of incredulity from onlookers suggest it might not be that far fetched.

Interesting fact from Spain: Mitsubishi were obliged to change the name of their Pajero 4X4 in Spain as 'pajero' translates in Spanish to 'Wanker'. Seems pretty accurate to me.

Charles 2 Injury mars Chapi comeback

2008-01-20T22:41:00.000+01:00

Above:Team photo: Charles 1, El Davo, Lewis, Rafael 2, El Negro, Francis, Joseph, Arthur, Rafael 2, Pedro, George, Charles 2.
Below: Lucian and George either challenging for the ball or practicing a new form of one-legged folk dancing.

After a month's layoff El Davo returned to provide the British bulldog spirit to good old Chapi vets. Having done reasonably without him the week before by scraping an 7-0 victory, Chapi started well in their new kit with Arthur robbing a defender to put Chapi one up. Unfortunately, the experienced defensive partnership of Charles 1 and Charles 2 could not prevent the intriguingly named C.D. U-3 from scoring twice before the break to put in danger Chapi's recent unbeaten run. Note: It may be uncharitable to say that the reluctance of Charles 1 and 2 to cover the left flank could open them up to the jibe of being a 'right couple of Charlies'.

Anyway, the second half started and soon El Davo was in action running aimlessly up and down the right wing distracting the opposing left back with his darting runs albeit without the luxury of having possession of the ball. Unfortunately, Charles 2 suffered a bad injury with 20 minutes to go (knee ligaments) and Chapi were against the wall. However, a bullet toe-punt by El Negro shot into the bottom corner with 5 minutes left to leave things all square and keep Chapi in 3rd place in the league.

The drama continued in the shower afterwards when the water vacillated between freezing and red hot without apparently settling at any temperature in between. As for the interesting fact from Spain, the items often referred to in English as 'balls' are called 'eggs' in Spanish. Consequently, there were several boiled ones in the shower, hopefully though with no lasting effects.

Last week's results and League Table

Twins and Christmas

2007-12-27T20:16:00.000+01:00

Well, first of all, sorry for the silence from El Davo. Due to injuries to both my calves (no I don't have a pair of small cows), I've been pretty much sidelined for the last month. I think the problem was caused by going out for a run. It wasn't the run itself, it was the fact that dozier than usual I ran 7 kms in my cricket boots instead of my running shoes.

Anyway, I'm better now but not quite perfect which could be a problem as I'm running, with 24,999 others, in the Madrid 10k run on New Year's Eve - or as it's better known, the Sansilvestre Vallecana.

Due to further Spanish holidays in early January ('Reyes' or kings - or three Wise Men), the next scheduled Chapi match will be on Sunday 13th January although there are rumours of a crunch match the previous weekend against Robledo (my home town) in the offing.

As for the interesting Spanish fact, Calves (as in legs) in Spanish are 'gemelos' which also means 'twins'. Maybe not so interesting but certainly relevant.

Chapi crocks romp to victory

2007-12-02T17:29:00.000+01:00

Despite a catalogue of injuries, Chapi brushed aside Calypo-Roblesport 7-0. To the amazement of El Davo, Chapi have now won three in a row, an experience similar to the rare occasion during his OP career when we won one in a row. Kicking off the second half 4-0 up, Arthur slammed the ball home from the half-way line via the underside of the crossbar and their keeper's backside. Arthur added another before Raphael, taking time off from his painting job, finished a mazy run by scoring off a post.

Pictures:
Left - Peter saluting captain Charles as a mark of respect (or the sun is in his eyes).
Bottom Left - Joseph either clearing a corner or doing a Swan Lake impression
Bottom Right: Warming up - Lewis, Arthur, Charles, George, Peter, Frank, Joseph & Raphael
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I've decided to add a weekly section entitled "An Interesting Fact from Spain". This week's interesting fact is that El Davo shares a birthday with David Beckham (2nd May), and is 23 years older - the same number as Becks' shirt at Real Madrid.

Chapi 12 run riot despite El Davo

2007-11-25T18:52:00.000+01:00

On a sunny crisp morning in downtown Navalcarnero, Chapi 12 demolished Calypto-City 13-2 to soar up the football 7s league. All of this is despite (or because of) El Davo playing for the opposition as they were short.

Arriving wearing his Spanish football team shirt (well he needs to find a team for next summer) little did he know he would be handed a yellow top and invited to join a demoralised Calypton-City squad smarting from a 9-0 hammering the week before. In a game more even than the score would indicate (is this possible?), El Davo linked up well with Roberto. The only problem was that the rest of the team played like England.

El Davo also enhanced the reputation of our fine country by accidently hacking down (usual) teamate George and a little later accidently kneeing Arthur simultaneously in both goolies (yes, both goolies, not both goalies). Handshakes and backslapping at the end could not disguise the underlying sentiment that Chapi would prefer to have El Davo on their side than playing for the opposition.

For those not knowledgeable about football 7s (futbol siete), here's a quick rundown. It's played on a area about half the size of a full-sized pitch, generally on artificial grass - not a cow pat in sight. There's no offside and an unlimited number of substitutions. The goal (see pic) is 6 metres wide (about 6.5 yards) and 2 metres high (6ft 6in). I think this could be the game for four dinners Given the small goal and his ample frontal surface area, he would take up a greater percentage of the goal and could save more goalbound shots without the inconvenience of moving, Just a thought.

6 man Chapi comeback triumph

2007-11-18T21:46:00.000+01:00

A cool morning (it reached a low of -7 degrees on the drive to the match) did not foretell the sunshine and incident-packed contest to follow. In a dramatic and controversial match, Chapineria 12 (including El Davo) came back from 3-2 down to triumph 4-3 over Los Ibericos. With time running out and captain Charles red-carded for continuous abuse to the ref (which he continued from the touchline after getting changed) goals from ...... well not sure about the 3rd as a quick free kick was too quick for me, and a terrific solo goal from Arthur saw the resolute Chapi team rise to an impressive third place in the league.

El Davo near home (a little less flat than Harrow)

Chapi are crushed!

2007-11-16T20:58:00.000+01:00

Due to some dismal defending, not unlike some I remember from my OP days, the Chapineria 12 (this is our name even though most of our games are football 7s) lost significantly on Sunday. Against El Alamo (even without John Wayne), we succumbed 8 (or maybe 9) to 4. My memory seemed to get unreliable after conceding the 7th.

It could have been worse as in the last minute I used several parts of my body (leg, elbow, forehead, etc.) to prevent one of their players scoring the 9th (or maybe 10th - see above). Lying prostrate at my feet I accused him of acting worthy of an Oscar and the referee duly agreed. My reputation is growing in the club!

As for our team, I will mention some of our players names with English translation (where possible).

Rafael (Rafael, I think!)
Jorge (George)
Jose (Joseph)
Miguel (Michael)
Arturo (Arthur)
Pedro (Peter)
Carlos (Charles)
Paco (Frank)

I'm a little concerned about Luis and Luciano whose names translate (I suppose) to Louise and Lucy but will be known as Lewis and El Negro.

El Davo at the Bernabeu

2007-11-16T20:35:00.001+01:00

No game last weekend due to some holiday for some saint or other (almost makes me religious). Picture taken outside the ground we share with other local team - forget what they are called but that bloke what's married to that skinny ex-Spice Girl used to play (or at least turn out) for them on occasions.

The Chapineria 12

2007-11-16T20:22:00.000+01:00

Arturo, Jose, El Davo, Carlos, Ernesto, Luciano, Miguel, Rafa, Pedro, Paco, Jorge, Carlos (2)

HAVE ATTACHED A PHOTO OF CHAPINERIA VETS PRIOR TO OUR FIRST 'FOOTBALL 7's' LEAGUE MATCH - IN WHICH 'WE WAS ROBBED' BY A MYOPIC REF BUT FINISHED 4 - 4.

TODAY WE THRASHED ANOTHER TEAM BY 7 - 1.

MY FIRST ACTION WAS TO HACK DOWN THEIR DANGER MAN BEFORE I HAD EVEN TOUCHED THE BALL. APPARENTLY THIS IS NOT CORRECT CONDUCT IN GIRLIE SPANISH FOOTBALL.

AMYWAY, WE PLAY AGAIN NEXT WEEKEND AND NEWS WILL BE FORTHCOMING IN DUE COURSE.

CHEERS - EL DAVO